Canadian PM and Wife Heading for Divorce; Now To Decide Who Will Keep the Toy Collection?

arindambanerjee /
arindambanerjee /

Announced to the people of Canada and the world via Instagram, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and his wife, Sophie, are now heading for divorce following 18 years of marriage. Both cited “many meaningful and difficult conversations” before coming to the decision.  In the PM’s post, he expressed that they have both signed a legal separation agreement.

While avoiding questions in the press, insiders have listed complications surrounding the Prime Minister’s alleged habits to be the reason behind the divorce. With three children in the house, 15-year-old Xavier, 14-year-old Ella-Grace, and 9-year-old Hadrien, allegations have been raised that the PM has been inappropriate, and his wife has had enough of it.

However, it’s not inappropriate in the manner of him being a sexual deviant with his children.

Rather, he has refused to allow the toys of the older children to be aged out of their residences and official vacation luggage. Instead, he has chosen to keep these toys for himself and his childish uses. Now, when he isn’t playing games with the lives of his fellow Canadian, holding truckers hostage over COVID vaccines and masks, or instituting new laws that are nonsensical, he is ignoring his wife’s bedroom needs to see just how far that new Hotwheels will launch from the second story balcony.

According to alarmed insiders who wished to stay anonymous, the straw that broke the camel’s back came on Canada Day on July 1st.

Perhaps there was an incident with one of his drivers…

Reportedly, this wasn’t the first time he had let other men enjoy his wife.

On multiple previous occasions, she has provided ‘company” to his male guests, including many foreign diplomats at his urging. He realized before they even got married that he simply wasn’t inclined or sufficiently equipped to keep his wife happy. It was then that he dove back into his love of toys. She has been more than happy to keep him around for her bidding while she enjoys other men to scratch the itch he won’t touch. I wouldn’t be surprised if the kids are someone else’s,” claimed another anonymous staffer.

These kinds of suspicions have been boiling just under the surface for decades, but given the sudden separation, it would make sense why they would simply claim they had talked about it and decided it was for the best. Despite never showing the Canadian people how unhappy they were directly and deliberately, they certainly hinted at it.

Looking back at multiple public appearances over the past, you can see her steam a longing glance at a diplomat or her annoyance when he tries to touch her. This is not a woman who is married to a real man or a man who even held his love for her at an appropriate level. Instead, it was someone who took her for granted and tried his best to keep her from letting the public know just how weak and unwilling to do the hard work he was.

While the separation is real, the anonymous staffers will ultimately remain anonymous as they are satirical. Then again, with the secrecy about the reasoning, perhaps they are foreshadowing the truth? Either way, this is a sad day for Canada, and, therefore, the world.